Life is a Journey

The weather sucks today, we had to end girls day early because of it. I hate this kind of weather because it is horrible to drive in and people are ass holes when it comes to driving in this type of weather. No one likes to drive in it and then you get people riding your ass, and pulling stupid moves on the road. Don't they realize that there stupidity is going to cause an accident? I don't think they care.  

Either way I got home safe and there was no damage to me or my car.  

 So I haven't updated in a long time on this thing so I thought it was time to get back into doing this. Since June my life has gotten worse and worse. My grandma died kind of unexpectedly in June and the family has fallen apart more than before. My mom's side of my family is not talking to me at all. To them I don't exist and I don't know how to feel about it all. Everything is a big mix of emotions and I don't know if I should be mad or happy. I don't have to hear them bad mouthing my dad all the time, and I don't have to deal with them making up lies about my family. Oh and then there is my grandmas house. My Aunts think they are going to be able to buy it. None of them have good enough credit to buy that house but they think they are. I don't understand it sometimes. I really want to get as far as I can away from this state and never look back. Never have to deal with my family again, start a new life where they can't find me.

So today was my first full day in the wonderful city of Orlando Florida, a wonderful place that's supposed to be sunny. Of course it wasn't it was cloudy all day and finally we left the ball park due to the immenient rain (we didn't want to get caught in it). But my cousin Mandy had a blast at her first spring training. She got autographs from eighteen players and got pictures with a bunch. It was a blast. 

In one week I'll be in sunny Florida to spend ten days at Braves spring training, I can't wait. Especially since it is blizzarding up here in Wisconsin. I've been busy getting all my stuff together for autographs, mostly photos that I want signed. But I can't wait.

So I am in a serious funk right now were I don't want to do anything. I mean I'm not doing my homework, I don't want to go to class, I don't want to work. Anything. All I feel like doing is sitting in my bed and watch stupid sitcoms and stupid movies. This is bad, I need to get out of this funk right now because I have to much due and not enough time to do it.

So I should be sleeping right now, but I'm obviously not. The last couple of days stuff seems to be hitting me a lot harder than usual, and I just can't seem to stop crying. Maybe I am finally letting everything hit me that is going on, I mean come on I almost freaked out when I found out my father was going out drinking and he was going to be driving home. It scared the crap out of me, what if I was to loose him too. I don't think I could make it through that.
I have pretty much cut myself off from my mom's side of the family, I have decided they aren't worth my time anymore and I don't care what they have to say. I really only talk to Joey and Rachael now a days. Which is so hard to fathom because I used to be so close to my moms side of the family. But the things they have pulled since my mom has died has made me hate them more and more each day. I don't care what anyone say's Stephanie Harling is a huge B****, and I will be happy the day she is dead. I know you are thinking that is harsh, but the lies she has told and continues to tell and get caught in is too much and she doesn't deserve to be on this earth.

So this week I lost 3.6 pounds, bringing my grand total up to 6.8 pounds which makes me so happy. But in the back of my mind I can feel the negativity of I have to have a bad week somewhere. But I am trying to ignore it and keep on task of doing the weight watchers thing, because I want to look great and skinny for once in my life.

That is hillarious!!!

BUCKS WIN!!!!

The Bucks won, I couldn't believe it, but it was expected because whenever my cousin comes to a Piston game here the bucks win. But it was so much fun.

So I haven't updated in awhile, and I don't know why, I mean I check this thing pretty much everyday, but I guess I just don't have enough time to do everything.
I made it through Christmas, it was tough but I did it. The one year anniversary is coming up in one week, that's going to be hard, but I'll be around people that I know care. It will also help that I'll be at Disney World for that week so I'll be busy doing stuff. Something that I need to do or I'll go insane.
I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday and the new year is blessed!

So today is December 1, and it is world aids day a day to remind people of this horrible disease and to remember all that have parished because of it. I lost my Uncle Mike to Aids my senior year of high school. We knew it was coming but it was still a devastating blow, especially since he didn't feel safe enough to tell us that he had it. We all knew he did, but he couldn't say it to us. So on this day remember all the ones that are out there with this terrible disease and remember there are plenty of ways to help. A great one is Camp Heartland, a camp for kids and there siblings who are aflicted by the virus to go to camp and have a time of normalcy and not worry about what people are thinking.

you're soda! everyone thinks you're hot and nobody
really gets mad at you.


Which Outsiders Boy Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Ponyboy Curtis - You're deep and dreamy and always
looking at sunsets. You are rather quiet, but
know how to protect yourself. You love all your
friends and understand your enemy easily.


What Greaser From 'The Outsiders' Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
greaser-----you play fair and even though people
think your trouble, your actually a good
person.



the outsiders(greaser or soc)
brought to you by Quizilla

SodaPop Curtis.

Everyone loves you. Girl or boy. Your happy go
lucky and your always grinning. Your a hit with
the opposite sex. Go you. You love your
siblings but are always put in the middle. You
couldn't sit still to save your life, but that
crazy grin will probably get you out of
trouble.


Which Outsiders (Greaser) Character are you? (with Pictures)
brought to you by Quizilla

(Refresh if picture doesn't show.)
Two-Bit Matthews: His real name is Keith. He has
the nickname of Two-Bit because he always has
to put his two bits(cents) and have his say.
Two-Bit is the joker of the Greasers gang. Even
though he is over 18 years of age, he still
goes to high school but just for the fun of it.


Which Outsiders Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

It has been ten months since my mom died. Almost a year, a year of hell and lose that I will never forget. A time when I have had to learn to deal with one of the greates tragedies in my life and hopefully the only one I will ever have to deal with. A time when I lost someone that meant the world to me and was my link to that side of the family. Something that has been seriously diminished since she has died. She had so many stories that she hadn't told me yet, so much that I needed to learn. But I will never get it now. As the holidays come up I am trying to figure out what I am going to do with this all. I don't know if I can make it through all of this. The first holidays without my mom, I don't know if I will be able to handle it. We'll see.

You scored as Peter Pan. Your alter ego is Peter Pan. You are a child at heart. Anything you believe is possible, and you never want to grow up. </td> Peter Pan 88% Ariel 81% Goofy 75% Cinderella 63% Sleeping Beauty 56% The Beast 50% Donald Duck 50% Pinocchio 44% Snow White 25% Cruella De Ville 6% Which Disney Character is your Alter Ego? created with QuizFarm.com

Your 80s Heartthrob Is

John Stamos

Are You a Child of the 80's? Take a look at this list. If you can identify with more than half of them, you are a child of the 80's.

You know what "Sike" means.
You know the profound meaning of "Wax on, Wax off".
You know that another name for a keyboard is a "Synthesizer".
You were only cool if you hung out at the Roller Rink and actually knew how to skate.
You can sing the McDonald's Big Mack Filet-o-fish, quarter pounder, French Fry song while jump roping.
You wore 3-8 different colored socks in layers and thought that the more you could wear the cooler you were.
You know who Mr. T is.
You actually believed for a minute that K.I.T. (The night rider) actually was real.
You know who Fat Albert is.
You wore fluorescent, neon clothing.
You could break dance, or wish you could.
You wanted to be The Incredible Hulk for Halloween.
You believed that "By the power of Greyskull, you HAD the power!"
Partying "like it's 1999" seemed SO far away.
You thought that Transformers were more than meets the eye
You wanted to be on Star Search.
You can remember Michael Jackson when he was black.
You wore a banana clip at some point during your youth.
You remember the garbage pail kids, and owned some.
You knew what Willis was "talkin' 'bout."
You HAD to have your MTV.
You always wondered why Tootie always wore those skates.
You actually thought "Dirty Dancing" was a REALLY good movie.
Your all time favorite movie was Footloose and you actually thought that Kevin Bacon was HOT in it!!!
You remember when ATARI was a state of the art video game system.
You own any cassettes.
You were led to believe that in the year 2000 we'd all be living on the moon.
You remember and/or owned any of the Care Bear Glass collection from Pizza Hut or any other stupid collection they came out with.
Poltergeist freaked you out
You carried your lunch to school in a Gremlins or an ET lunch box.
You have pondered why Smurfette was the ONLY female smurf.
You know what leg warmers are and probably had a pair.
You wore biker shorts underneath a short skirt and felt stylish.
You had a Swatch Watch with the Swatch Guard.
You thought UTFOs "Roxanne, Roxanne" song was the bomb!
You remember when Saturday Night Live was funny.
You had Wonder Woman or Superman underoos.
You know what a "Push Up" ice cream is.
You had to come in the house when the street lights came on.

So yesterday was halloween as everyone knows, while the preschoolers came over and went trick or treating on the college part of the campus. It was the cutest thing ever. We had all these little kids dressed up in costumes walking around going from office to office getting candy. It was adorable.

Your Hair Should Be Pink

Hyper, insane, and a boatload of fun. You're a traveling party that everyone loves to follow.

You Failed 8th Grade Math

Oh no, you only got 5/10 correct!

How You Life Your Life

You tend to deprive yourself of things you crave, for your own good. You say whatever is on your mind. Other people's reactions don't phase you. Your friends tend to be a as quirky as you are - which is saying a lot! Some of your past dreams have disappointed you, but you don't let it get you down.

All I have to say is I hate stiches, they are irritating the hell out of me. They hurt, oh and now they are itching which totally sucks because I can't itch them or they will hurt more. Oh and don't forget the fact that my head has taken to still bleeding every once and a while. So yesterday I ended up with a tricle of blood down my forehead. It wasn't fun. Oh it was disgusting. At least I have no home work due, which is wonderful because I don't feel like doing anything anyways. On Saturday I went to the Bucks game, and I took Rachael, Shelbi, and Megan. It was fun we ended up sitting behind Vonzell from American Idol. She was really nice and Megan took a picture with her. It turned out really cute. So that was cool. Oh and I went up to the Suite Level to see who was working up there still, and it turns out that they got rid of almost all of the runners that they used to have. So I am glad I am not up there anymore, because it sounds boring up there now.

This weekend has been another interesting one, well Friday night me and the girls went to an art show at UWM, and it was a little scary. There was a video with these crazy people dancing. But it was fun. Saturday we went to the Elegant Farmer to pick pumpkins and apples, the four of us trying to get apples out of trees was quite hilarious, and I have the video to prove it. Oh and the hay ride was fun to, I was waiting for one of us to fall off because it was so bumpy. Sunday I had to go to the Spaghetti Dinner for the South Side Scholarhip Foundation and deal with family. It wasn't bad, but I really didn't want to be there. Then Tuesday came, I had to go to the doctor, and I found out the mole that I have been putting off having completely removed since the acciedent has to come off now, because it is precancerous. Which isn't cool because I don't need that worry over my head now. I have way to many other things going through my head right now. Hopefully it hasn't progressed past precancerous yet. *crosses fingers* I am having it removed on Friday and hopefully I'll know next week.

So this week has been hellish, this weekend I went camping with my girl scouts and I found out something that I never wanted to hear come out of my girls mouths, one of my girls is having sex. She is fourteen and is having sex. It hurts but I was truthful with her and I asked her if she was using protection. Which she says she is. Oh and it was freezing the whole weekend. Oh and the hell just continues beacuse it is mid term week so I am studying like hell, but I want good grades, so I am working so hard. We'll see if it all works out, we'll see at the end of the semester how good I did.

So I was watching the outsiders last night, the new edition of it with all the extra scences, and they have an option of watching it with commentary from a bunch of the cast. So I put that on, and as I was watching it, Rob Lowe starts talking about how he asked SE Hinton what happens to Sodapop after the book and she says he dies in Vietnam, how can you kill Sodapop, he's one of my favorite characters. I was so mad when I heard that. But if you haven't seen the new edition of the outsiders you have to, it's wonderful, lots of new scenes actually in the movie. Not just in the extras.